Summer in Tetovo :) or :( ???

Too many promises, too many lies...why is so hard to find summer job abroad? Why we should give too much money in this time called "global time" where everything suppose to be  near as one "global village" ? In the same global time we need a lot of money to find a job...yes, we should pay for our job! And when we give that money, MAYBE but only MAYBE we'll have a job, but then we are not sure for what we really have to work...for those money that we gave to an agency or for ourself and our student costs. Until now I haven't find a solution for summer job exactly because of these lies and empty promises...Anyway, let's try to be happy for sunny days and for the period when I'm sleeping all the day and living all the night. Oh yes, also for listening wedding music and siren of cars NI NU NI NU. Sometimes we will hear something like BOOM BOOM, or PUM PUM..don't worry it's not something big...it's just gun or rifle... nothing else :)

I hate goodbyes that's why I'm not saying it!

''Never say never'' is statement dedicated to ESP class...We will continue to have unformal ESP classes :)

I will really but really, really miss this class!

Video from youth exchange

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CCr0sQgSMjY

Here is the video from youth exchange. Inside of it, there are two things : one of them is commercial of promoting vollunteerism [where I've decide to use non verbal communication - body language because of deaf and mute people] in second video I had one role related to peer violence, and it's a little bit funny but with big meaning.
I'm still waiting for video of theater performance that I promised you in last post.
Now for now, enjoy this video :) Hope you like it! :)

Hello everyone :)
I just want to share with you one of 6463463476 pictures made in my youth echange in Vojvodina. There I was part of theatre group and we had a great performance for PEACE. I hope that soon I'll get the video from the performance and of course I'll share it with you.

The path to a powerful Presentation

You'll be Inspired Even if You Have a Fear of Public Speaking!

Learn the Public Speaking Techniques of a Champion

On April 26, 1992, Darren LaCroix made his stand-up comedy debut. It was, by all accounts, a disaster. Ten years later he "outspoke" 25,000 contestants from 14 countries in an international speech contest...and was crowned the World Champion of Public Speaking.
How did he do it? How can you do it? "Before I was a great speaker, I was a phenomenal student." - Darren LaCroix
Darren LaCroix, the World Champion of Public Speaking, spent those ten years studying the techniques of great speakers. And one element continually jumped out at him: developing effective communication skills was a process that could be learned.
The Path to Powerful Presentations video takes you through Darren's journey as he uncovered the secrets of professional speaking. The video culls the formulas of persuasive speaking and the methods of inspirational communication into a practical guide for giving powerful presentations.
You, too, Can Learn to Be an Effective Public Speaker

• See actual footage of Darren's awful comedy debut at Stitches Comedy Club in Boston, MA.
• Watch Darren's awesome world championship winning speech in Anaheim, CA
• Examine the habits, discipline, and hard work that transformed Darren from chump to champ.

This powerful public speaking training program takes you step-by-step through the process of becoming an effective public speaker.
Forever Change Your Public Speaking Skills
Have you ever sat in awe of conference speakers who hold an audience in the palm of their hand? Do you wish you could do that? Darren LaCroix, the World Champion of Public Speaking is proof that anyone can learn how to give powerful presentations!
This public speaking workshop video is your front row seat to the techniques of a World Champion Public Speaker. It is guaranteed to transform your current public speaking skills into highly effective communication skills. You will learn:

• how to be a better speaker
• how to deliver a powerful message, and
• how to speak with impact!

Darren was not born with the gift of public speaking. But his drive, determination, and daring to dream led him on a journey from an awful to awesome public speaker. He is living proof that you can accomplish anything if you are willing to work hard at it.
Public Speaking Techniques You Will Learn

• How to analyze your public speaking failures and turn those lessons into successes
• The secrets of professional speakers
• How to turn stage fright into stage presence

Through information gleaned in the public speaking training programs and humor workshops developed by his company, The Humor Institute, Darren reveals the:

• Habits professional speakers must develop
• Importance of a speech coach
• Significance of the Triangle of WOW

"You have speaking down to a science!"
- Jim Key, World Champion of Public Speaking-Runner up
Darren outlines public speaking techniques that will build your confidence and help you become an effective and inspirational speaker.
Start on your path to powerful presentation skills today! Order The Path to Powerful Presentations -In Other Words, How I Went from Chump to Champ. Darren LaCroix, World Champion of Public Speaking

References : http://www.humor411.com/books/powerful_presentations.html

Giving and Receiving Feedback

Feedback: Negative, Positive or Just Right?

Copyright Gail Zack Anderson
Some of us are really good at giving positive feedback. Others are really good at giving negative feedback. Not many seem skilled in providing both, what I call balanced feedback. Occasionally a client will tell me, “just tell it like it is. Be brutally honest.” Or, “you are just being nice.” This makes me wonder if my feedback is too polite, or too subtle, even though I try to give it honestly and in a balanced fashion. Why? Let’s take a look at what can happen when you give feedback, either too positive or too negative.

Too little positive feedback.

While working recently with a manager, I noticed that he tended to give mostly negative feedback, and very little positive. This manager stated that he had been taught that giving negative feedback would be more motivational. He also thought positive feedback seemed “too soft” and unnecessary. As he added: “Why should we praise people for just doing their jobs?”
When most or all feedback is negative, people know what you don’t like, but they often have to guess at what you do like or want from them. They may feel overwhelmed and discouraged by the criticism, and they may take it personally. They don’t ready minds, and so are often confused about what you really want. They may lose confidence, since everything they do seems wrong. In addition, if the only time they hear from you is when you have a complaint, they may soon begin to feel defensive, or try to avoid interactions with you.
That said, negative feedback has its place. To be effective it needs to be specific and non-judgmental. Compare these two comments on a written report:

1. “I can’t believe you turned in such shoddy work. Don’t you know any better?”
2. “One of your conclusions was faulty and you had 3 typos on the report.”

The first comment is shaming and demotivating. I feel bad, but I don’t know what I should do differently. The second comment seems deliberately unemotional, so it takes the shame out of it. It also gives me specific information about what I can do to improve.

Too much positive feedback.

If you are a big believer in positive feedback, or if you don’t want to hurt people’s feelings, you may be relying too much on positive feedback and fail to deliver the bad news. We have all heard about employees who received glowing performance reviews right up to the day they were let go for “performance issues.” Obviously, there were problems that should have been addressed. If all you give is positive feedback, people can have an unrealistically high view of their worth and performance levels. Because they receive unbalanced feedback, they can have confidence above and beyond their actual performance levels.
Positive reinforcement certainly has its place, and to be effective it also needs to be specific and clear. Consider these two examples:

1. “Good job. Keep it up.”
2. “Your report was clear, your conclusions were on target, and the writing was crisp and accurate.”

The first comment may make me feel good, but I am not really sure what was right about my work. It might make me feel bad because you didn’t even take time to notice what I did. In other words, the easy compliment seems canned and can come across as insincere. The second comment is all positive, but it tells me what you valued, and clearly shows you read my report.

Balanced feedback.

Balanced feedback provides feedback on what is being done well as well as what could be improved. The positive feedback builds confidence and reinforces the “good” behavior you want to see more of. It clarifies expectations. It feels good. The negative feedback is given factually and preferably with suggestions for improvement.
Consider this example of balanced feedback:
1. “Your report was clear, your conclusions were on target, and the writing was crisp and accurate. There were several typos, and for that I suggest more careful proofing. And one of your conclusions wasn’t clear to me. Let’s talk it over this afternoon and compare notes. Overall, great job!”
If you lead, coach or develop people, I suggest aiming for balanced feedback that builds confidence, shows the direction you want the performance to take, and highlights areas for improvement in a clear, non-punishing way. At the same time, note that people react differently. Some crave the honest feedback, and some crave the “feel good” aspects of positive feedback. Some remember and take to heart any criticism, and some live for it. So adjust accordingly, but always strive to be honest, sincere and matter-of-fact.
By being honest and straightforward, and by offering balanced feedback, the people you influence can build skills and confidence at the same time.

How to Share Useful – and Respectful – Feedback

Copyright Carter McNamara, MBA, PhD
Feedback to employees is information regarding their performance and also is information they can act on. Feedback must be shared in a manner that is understandable to them and is perceived by them as being provided in a highly respectful manner. Sharing feedback involves skills in effective listening, verbal and non-verbal communications, and working in multi-cultural environments. Consider the following guidelines, as well.

1. Be clear about what you want to say before you say it.

You might have already sensed what feedback you want to convey. However, you should be clear to yourself about what you want to convey and how you want to convey it.

2. Share your feedback in a concise and specific manner, then you can embellish.

People often lose specificity when they speak because they say far too much, rather than not enough. Or, they speak about general themes and patterns. When giving feedback, first share what you saw or heard, what you want instead, and how the person can achieve it. Then you can add more descriptive information if necessary.

3. Avoid generalizations.

Avoid use of the words “all,” “never” and “always.” Those words can seem extreme, lack credibility and place arbitrary limits on behavior. Be more precise about quantity or proportion, if you address terms of quantities, at all.

4. Be descriptive rather than evaluative.

Report what you are seeing, hearing or feeling. Attempt to avoid evaluative words, such as “good” or “bad.” It may be helpful to quickly share your particular feeling, if appropriate, but do not dwell on it or become emotional.

5. Own the feedback.

The information should be about your own perception of information, not about the other’s perceptions, assumptions and motives. Use ‘I’ statements as much as possible to indicate that your impressions are your own.

6. Be careful about giving advice.

When giving feedback, it is often best to do one thing at a time – share your feedback, get the person’s response to your feedback, and then, when he/she is more ready to consider additional information, share your advice with him/her.

References : http://managementhelp.org/communicationsskills/feedback.htm

Persuasive Speech

What is persuasive speech? Persuasive Speech and Persuasive Public Speaking is the art of using words to influence an audience.
It involves directing, guiding, or appealing to the thinking, logic or emotions of an individual or an audience. The goal is to help the listeners to accept the idea, attitude, or action being presented by the speaker. It is accomplished by the use of argumentation, rationalization, symbolism, and presenting supportive information.
Learning What Persuasive Speech Is?

We started learning to use persuasion when we were born. We influenced the filling of our needs through our body language, crying or laughing. As we grew, we started using more sophisticated means to get what we wanted. We tried whining. When it failed, we advanced to more socially acceptable forms of persuasive speech. We subconsciously sought the answer to "What is persuasive speech?"
We used it to be able to stay out late, buy our first car or other aspects of growth and development. Learning how to use the art of persuasion was part of our growth and development.
Whenever we get a ticket for violating a traffic law, we have the right to use the art of persuasive speech to reduce or eliminate the charges against us with both the officer (slim chance but possible) and in a court of law.
The necessity of persuasive speech can be seen in its use. Consider situations when natural disaster is eminent or compliance with directions could save a life. What is persuasive speech? A way to save lives.
Taken to its highest art form it becomes negotiation.
Failure to learn how to do it can lead to a life of constant capitulation and compromise. Not knowing how to use it could result in loss of freedoms. It can limit the ability to communicate helpful and beneficial information.

What is Persuasive Speech in Public Speaking?
The types of persuasion can be classified into modes or devices. These are the same for writing. They are Ethos, Pathos, and Logos.

One of the oldest writings on the subject is by Aristotle. He felt there were three tools to help with persuasion.

Personal Character

When Speech Stirs Emotions

Using speech to prove a truth by means of persuasive argumentation.To further answer the question, “What is persuasive speech?” requires looking at those three tools. These are basic tools that are used in rhetoric and public speaking. Mastery of these tools is not a simple process.

References : http://www.speechmastery.com/what-is-persuasive-speech.html

Informative speech

The Informative Speech:
The purpose of a speech to inform is to provide information the audience does not already have. Even if the audience does have some general knowledge of your topic, an informative speech will give them new knowledge or more in-depth information on that topic. The informative speech does not advocate one idea over another, but remains nonpartisan.
Many speakers - both new and skilled - have difficulty distinguishing between an informative and persuasive speech. You must be able to identify the difference. This often happens while you are creating your speech: you have shifted the objective of the speech. This is why you need to continually refer back to your specific purpose statement. This will help you remain in focus of your purpose and your motive. And it is easy to see why these two types of speeches can be confused: both impart information. In fact, the strongest persuasive speech imparts new and in-depth information to support the thesis. The motive is the major difference. Ask yourself as you begin creating, while in the process of, and as you conclude the speech, "What is my motive here? What reasons do I want to give this audience this information?"
Some topics are easy to classify: a speech that urges you to donate blood is attempting to change or reinforce your behavior. The speech which identifies what donated blood is used for within the community would be an informative speech. A speech which discusses different world religions would be a speech to inform; a speech which advocates your own religion would be a speech to persuade. The line is not always clear: a demonstration of how to brush your teeth correctly (informative) versus the speech on the importance of good dental care (persuasive), for example.
General types of informative speeches:
Speeches about objects, people: These types of informative speeches are about things in our sensory and physical world - things you can see and hear and smell and feel and taste. A speech on a country, an important (to you) person, a plant, a bug, buildings would all be a speech about objects.
Speeches about events: These type of speeches are about anything that has or will happen. It can be something like Mardi Gras or the current volcanoes in Hawaii, the recent ferry wreck in Haiti, or even current disasters throughout the world.
Speeches about processes: Realize you have already given an informative speech: the speech to demonstrate. These type of speeches take the audience through a series of events which lead them to a specific result or product. How to create holiday ornaments, how to take dents out of fenders and how to tune a guitar are all speeches about processes.
Speech about concepts: These type of speeches are dealing with theories, ideas, beliefs and other abstract principles. Explaining democracy, music theory or Martin Luther King, Jr.'s principle of peaceful revolution would fit into this category.
Informative speeches can be organized in a topical, chronological or spatial pattern. They will never be organized in a problem/solution or a cause/effect pattern.
Remember as you create your speech to include the principles of what make a good speech: involving your audience, keeping them involved, using a clear thesis statement, giving clear supporting material, and concluding the speech with impact. Avoid becoming too technical in your explanations. Given the limited amount of time for this speech, avoid a question/answer session. This must be included in your time limit. If anyone has questions, tell them you will be happy to answer any questions following the speech session. 

References : http://spot.pcc.edu/~dwerkman/lecture3.html

Managing Presentation Nerves

Our top 10 Tips to help you Manage your Presentation Nerves

1	Visualise a positive outcome ahead of the day. Imagine yourself giving the presentation ahead of time. Visualise yourself at the end. You know it went well. Remember how you felt. What you saw in the room. Try and be as detailed as possible. Repeat this several times ahead of the actual day.
2	Use prompt cards (eg 6"x4" record cards) to remember the key phrases in your presentation. Use one card per slide (If you are using Powerpoint). This means if you were to lose your place you would be able to regain your composure again by simply checking your prompt card.
3	Practise delivering the presentation out aloud. Use the prompt cards and your slides to make the rehearsal as real as possible.
4	Practise breathing techniques. You need to breathe deeply using your stomach to full effect. A few deep breaths can help to reduce the tension and help you relax.
5	Focus your energy on something other than your impending presentation. eg if seated waiting for your turn to present, try to make your arms as heavy as possible on the arms of the chair. Try to make them feel like "dead weights". Push down on the arms of the chair. (But try not to break the chair!)
6	Clench your fists tighly then release them and stretch your fingers as much as possible. Do this several times just before you have to stand up to present.
7	Try and visit the presentation room ahead of time so that you can accustomise yourself to the room layout, where you will be presenting from etc.
8	Try not to keep notes on large sheets of paper (A4 or fullscap) and then hold the notes whilst you are presenting. If you are holding them and your hand is shaking a bit it will make you more aware of the fact. Try to use prompt cards instead or ensure that your notes are on the lecturn.
9	Remember that most good speakers feel nervous when they speak. You need to have nervous energy if you want to make a more dynamic presentation. Remember too that although you might be feeling quite nervous inside that doesnt need to be obvious to your audience.
10	Practise smiling in a mirror. The more you can smile when presenting the more you will be able to take control of your nerves.

References : http://www.communication-skills.info/Help-managing-presentation-nerves.shtml

Public Speaking

SEVEN STEPS TO CREATING AN EFFECTIVE SPEECH

The first step in making a speech is choosing a topic. We will assume you already have a topic since your qualifications, the audience, or the occasion usually determines it.

If you do not have a topic, your most effective speeches will come from a topic you are familiar with or that you want to learn more about.

The second step is to define the purpose of your speech. Are you speaking to persuade your audience, inform your audience, or a combination of the two? And, what are you persuading your audience to do, or what are you informing them about? The answers to these questions will define the purpose of your speech.

The third step is to get to know your audience. Get to know the demographic features of your audience. You want to know how large the audience will be, what sort of setting or conditions you will be speaking in, how the audience feels about the topic, and how the audience feels about you as the speaker. Gauge how important these factors will be on the speaking situation and adjust your speech accordingly. Keep in mind the audience is the focus of your speech, and you re looking for a positive response from them.

The fourth step is to gather information for your speech. There are countless sources of information, but here are a few: interviews, the Internet, scholarly journals, government documents, newspapers, and magazines. This information can be used in your speech in a variety of ways. It may be used to supply examples for supporting your ideas, or as statistics to quantify your ideas.

The fifth step is to organize your speech. Start by identifying the main points you want to make, and then put them in an order that makes sense to your topic. You can order them chronologically if your topic covers a sequence of events; spatially if you are describing something from top to bottom, east to west, or according to some other avenue; or, problem-solution order if you are presenting a problem followed by a solution.

The sixth step is adding an introduction to your speech. The introduction is aimed at getting the attention of your audience. There are several ways to accomplish this, the most common are: relating the topic to the audience, shocking the audience with an intriguing or astonishing statement, questioning the audience, or telling a suspenseful or provocative story. The next phases of the introduction are to state the topic of your speech so the audience will know what you are going to talk about, and to preview the main points of your speech so the audience will know what to listen for.

The seventh step is adding a conclusion to your speech. First, signal to the audience that your speech is coming to a close by using phrases such as "In conclusion," In closing," and "Let me end by saying." Second, reinforce the main point of your speech. You can do this by simply restating your main points, ending with a quotation that summarizes your main points, or by making a dramatic statement that emphasizes your main points. 

Refeences : http://cobweb2.louisville.edu/faculty/regbruce/bruce//mgmtwebs/commun_f98/publicspeaking.htm

 

What is a effective presentation?

A effective presentation makes the best use of the relationship between the presenter and the audience. It takes full consideration of the audience’s needs in order to capture their interest, develop their understanding, inspire their confidence and achieve the presenter’s objectives.
Careful planning is essential.

Seven stages in planning a presentation

1. Preparation

Many factors affect the design of your presentation. A powerful presenter will acknowledge and address each of the following:

• objectives;
• audience;
• venue;
• remit.

Objectives

Why you are making your presentation? Bear in mind what you want to achieve and what you want your audience to take away with them. Once you have decided upon your objectives, you are in a much better position to make strategic decisions about the design and tone of your presentation. For example, a presentation to a seminar group might require a balanced
argument, whereas a charity appeal might require a more creative approach. Ask yourself:

• what do you want your audience to have understood?
• what action do you want your audience to take following your presentation?
• how can you best design your presentation to meet your objectives?

Audience

Your audience will have a variety of different experiences, interests and levels of knowledge. A powerful presenter will need to acknowledge these and prepare for and respond to them accordingly. Ask yourself:

• how much will your audience already know about your topic?
• how can you link new material to things they might already understand?
• will you need to win them over to a particular point of view?

You may not be able to answer these questions for each member of your audience but you should have enough information to ensure that you have targeted your material at the right level for their needs. This might involve avoiding technical jargon or explaining abstract concepts with clear practical examples. If you fail to consider your audience’s needs, you will fail to appeal to their interest and imagination.

Venue

Where will you be making your presentation? What will the room be like? What
atmosphere will the physical conditions create? A large lecture theatre might create a formal atmosphere. Similarly, a seminar room might create a less formal tone. Ask yourself:

• what kind of atmosphere do you wish to create?
• how might the room arrangement affect your relationship with the audience?
• can you do anything to change the arrangement of the room to suit your
  objectives?
• what audio-visual aids can you use?

Remit

You may well have been given a remit for your presentation; you will need to stick to this. For example, you may have been asked to present a paper at a conference in a certain style or meet certain assessment criteria on your course. Ask yourself:

• how much time have you been allocated?
• are you required to stick to a common format or style?
• have any guidelines been set regarding the content of your presentation (i.e. a predetermined title, or a fixed number of overhead transparencies)?

2. Choosing your main points

Once you have thought about the design of your presentation, you can define your main points. Try presenting no more than three main points in a ten minute presentation. Always allow time for an adequate introduction and conclusion. It is difficult for an audience to follow a more complex argument without significant help from the presenter. A powerful presentation delivers information in a logical, structured manner, building on the previous point and avoiding large jumps in sequence. Ask yourself:

• what are the main points you wish to make?
• are these points structured in a logical, coherent way?
• do these main points reflect your own objectives and take account of the needs of your audience?

3. Choosing your supporting information

The supporting information helps your audience understand, believe in and agree with your main points. This evidence might take the form of factual data, points of detail or an explanation of process. It might be presented in imaginative ways using diagrams, pictures or video segments. Think about:

• what will add clarity to your argument (explaining complex terms, reminding your audience of any supporting theories)?
• what will add authority to your argument (making connections with other
  people's work, quoting experts, offering evidence from your own research)?
• what will add colour to your argument (showing a video clip or a slide, using a
  practical example or a vibrant analogy)?

4. Establishing linking statements

The next stage is to develop the linear flow of your presentation. This can be achieved by using linking statements to show clearly how your main points fit together. Common linking statements include:

• “The next stage in our project was to …”;
• “Another important issue of consideration was …”;
• “By following this argument we can now see that …”.

Linking statements send signals to your audience, highlighting the next point in your argument, linking to earlier ideas or clarifying the stage you have reached in your argument overall. This may be of particular importance in a lengthy presentation where even the most effective presenter has to work hard to keep an audience involved.

5. Developing an opening

The introduction to your presentation is crucial. It is your first point of contact with your audience; you can either capture or lose your audience’s interest in a matter of seconds. Use your introduction to lay a clear foundation for the presentation to follow. Try using the following structure:

• introduce yourself;
• state what you will be talking about (a title or subject area);
• state how you will be talking about it (e.g. by comparing test results or reviewing the supporting literature);
• state what you intend to be the outcome of your presentation (an informed
  group, a lively discussion);
• state what you expect your audience to do (listen, take notes, read a handout, ask questions before/during/after).

Always give your audience a moment to absorb this information before moving into your first main point.

6. Developing a conclusion

Your conclusion is another important stage in your presentation. You can use it to remind your audience of your main points, draw these points to a stimulating conclusion and leave your audience with a lasting impression of the quality of your presentation. The following structure provides a powerful conclusion:

• a review of your title or subject area
  “In this presentation I wanted to explore the relationship between X and Y.”;
• a summary of your main points
  “We have discussed the following points…”;
• a summary of the process you have been through
  “By looking at X we have found that Y …”;
• a conclusion clearly drawn from your main points (this must be supported by the detail of your presentation)
  “It is clear that there can be no substantive relationship between X and Y”;
• a parting statement to stimulate your audience’s thoughts (this might be a
  question or a bold comment).

7. Reviewing your presentation

Once you have written your presentation make sure that you review its content. Ask yourself:

• does the presentation meet your objectives?
• is it logically structured?
• have you targeted the material at the right level for your audience?
• is the presentation too long or too short?

References: http://www2.le.ac.uk/offices/careers/ld/resources/presentation/planning-presentation

What is verbal communication?

Verbal Communication

The basis of communication is the interaction between people.  Verbal communication is one way for people to communicate face-to-face.  Some of the key components of verbal communication are sound, words, speaking, and language. 

At birth, most people have vocal cords, which produce sounds.  As a child grows it learns how to form these sounds into words.  Some words may be imitative of natural sounds, but others may come from expressions of emotion, such as laughter or crying.  Words alone have no meaning.  Only people can put meaning into words.  As meaning is assigned to words, language develops, which leads to the development of speaking.

The actual origin of language is subject to considerable speculation.  Some theorists believe it is an outgrowth of group activities such as working together or dancing.  Others believe that language developed from basic sounds and gestures.

Over 3,000 languages and major dialects are spoken in the world today.  The development of languages reflects class, gender, profession, age group, and other social factors.  The huge variety of languages usually creates difficulties between different languages, but even within a single language there can be many problems in understanding.

Through speaking we try to eliminate this misunderstanding, but sometimes this is a very hard thing to do.  Just as we assume that our messages are clearly received, so we assume that because something is important to us, it is important to others.  As time has proven this is not at all true.  Many problems can arise is speaking and the only way to solve these problems is through experience.

Speaking can be looked at in two major areas: interpersonal and public speaking.  Since the majority of speaking is an interpersonal process, to communicate effectively we must not simply clean up our language, but learn to relate to people.

In interpersonal speaking, etiquette is very important.  To be an effective communicator one must speak in a manner that is not offending to the receiver.  Etiquette also plays an important role in an area that has developed in most all business settings: hierarchical communication.   In business today, hierarchical communication is of utmost importance to all members involved.

The other major area of speaking is public speaking.  From the origin of time, it has been obvious that some people are just better public speakers than others.  Because of this, today a good speaker can earn a living by speaking to people in a public setting.  Some of the major areas of public speaking are speaking to persuade, speaking to inform, and speaking to inspire or motivate.

References : http://cobweb2.louisville.edu/faculty/regbruce/bruce//mgmtwebs/commun_f98/Verbal.htm

What is non-verbal communication?

Definition  “nonverbal communication involves those nonverbal stimuli in a communication setting that are generated by both the source [speaker] and his or her use of the environment and that have potential message value for the source or receiver [listener].   Basically it is sending and receiving messages in a variety of ways without the use of verbal codes (words).  It is both intentional and unintentional.  Most speakers / listeners are not conscious of this.   It includes — but is not limited to:
• touch
• glance
• eye contact (gaze)
• volume
• vocal nuance
• proximity
• gestures
• facial expression ? pause (silence)
• intonation
• dress
• posture
• smell
• word choice and syntax
• sounds (paralanguage)
Broadly speaking, there are two basic categories of non-verbal language:         nonverbal messages produced by the body;         nonverbal messages produced by the broad setting (time, space, silence)

Why is non-verbal communication important?

Basically, it is one of the key aspects of communication (and especially important in a high-context culture).  It has multiple functions:  
• Used to repeat the verbal message (e.g. point in a direction while stating directions.
• Often used to accent a verbal message. (e.g. verbal tone indicates the actual meaning of the specific words).
• Often complement the verbal message but also may contradict.  E.g.: a nod reinforces a positive message (among Americans); a “wink” may contradict a stated positive message.
• Regulate interactions (non-verbal cues covey when the other person should speak or not speak).
• May substitute for the verbal message (especially if it is blocked by noise, interruption, etc) — i.e. gestures (finger to lips to indicate need for quiet), facial expressions (i.e. a nod instead of a yes).
Note the implications of the proverb: “Actions speak louder than words.”  In essence, this underscores the importance of non-verbal communication.  Non-verbal communication is especially significant in intercultural situations. Probably non-verbal differences account for typical difficulties in communicating.

Cultural Differences in Non-verbal Communication

1. General Appearance and Dress
All cultures are concerned for how they look and make judgements based on looks and dress.  Americans, for instance, appear almost obsessed with dress and personal attractiveness.  Consider differing cultural standards on what is attractive in dress and on what constitutes modesty. Note ways dress is used as a sign of status?

2. Body Movement
We send information on attitude toward person (facing or leaning towards another), emotional statue (tapping fingers, jiggling coins), and desire to control the environment (moving towards or away from a person). More than 700,000 possible motions we can make — so impossible to categorize them all!  But just need to be aware the body movement and position is a key ingredient in sending messages.
3. Posture
Consider the following actions and note cultural differences:
• Bowing (not done, criticized, or affected in US; shows rank in Japan)
• Slouching (rude in most Northern European areas)
• Hands in pocket (disrespectful in Turkey)
• Sitting with legs crossed (offensive in Ghana, Turkey)
• Showing soles of feet. (Offensive in Thailand, Saudi Arabia)
• Even in US, there is a gender difference on acceptable posture?
4. Gestures
Impossible to catalog them all.  But need to recognize: 1) incredible possibility and variety and 2) that an acceptable in one’s own culture may be offensive in another.  In addition, amount of gesturing varies from culture to culture.  Some cultures are animated; other restrained.  Restrained cultures often feel animated cultures lack manners and overall restraint.  Animated cultures often feel restrained cultures lack emotion or interest. Even simple things like using hands to point and count differ. Pointing : US with index finger; Germany with little finger; Japanese with entire hand (in fact most Asians consider pointing with index finger to be rude) Counting:  Thumb = 1 in Germany, 5 in Japan, middle finger for 1 in Indonesia.  
5. Facial Expressions
While some say that facial expressions are identical, meaning attached to them differs.  Majority opinion is that these do have similar meanings world-wide with respect to smiling, crying, or showing anger, sorrow, or disgust.  However, the intensity varies from culture to culture.  Note the following:
• Many Asian cultures suppress facial expression as much as possible.
• Many Mediterranean (Latino / Arabic) cultures exaggerate grief or sadness while most American men hide grief or sorrow.
• Some see “animated” expressions as a sign of a lack of control.
• Too much smiling is viewed in as a sign of shallowness.
• Women smile more than men.
 
6. Eye Contact and Gaze
In USA, eye contact indicates: degree of attention or interest, influences attitude change or persuasion, regulates interaction, communicates emotion, defines power and status, and has a central role in managing impressions of others.
• Western cultures — see direct eye to eye contact as positive (advise children to look a person in the eyes).  But within USA, African-Americans use more eye contact when talking and less when listening with reverse true for Anglo Americans.  This is a possible cause for some sense of unease between races in US.  A prolonged gaze is often seen as a sign of sexual interest.
• Arabic cultures make prolonged eye-contact. — believe it shows interest and helps them understand truthfulness of the other person.  (A person who doesn’t reciprocate is seen as untrustworthy)
• Japan, Africa, Latin American, Caribbean — avoid eye contact to show respect.
 
7. Touch
Question: Why do we touch, where do we touch, and what meanings do we assign when someone else touches us?
Illustration: An African-American male goes into a convenience store recently taken over by new Korean immigrants.  He gives a $20 bill for his purchase to Mrs Cho who is cashier and waits for his change.  He is upset when his change is put down on the counter in front of him.What is the problem?  Traditional Korean (and many other Asian countries) don’t touch strangers., especially between members of the opposite sex.   But the African-American sees this as another example of discrimination (not touching him because he is black).
Basic answer:  Touch is culturally determined!  But each culture has a clear concept of what parts of the body one may not touch.  Basic message of touch is to affect or control  — protect, support, disapprove (i.e. hug, kiss, hit, kick).
• USA — handshake is common (even for strangers), hugs, kisses for those of opposite gender or of family (usually) on an increasingly  more intimate basis. Note differences between African-Americans and Anglos in USA.  Most African Americans touch on greeting but are annoyed if touched on the head (good boy, good girl overtones).
• Islamic and Hindu:  typically don’t touch with the left hand.  To do so is a social insult.  Left hand is for toilet functions.  Mannerly in India to break your bread only with your right hand (sometimes difficult for non-Indians)
•  Islamic cultures generally don’t approve of any touching between genders (even hand shakes).  But consider such touching (including hand holding, hugs) between same-sex to be appropriate.
• Many Asians don’t touch the head (Head houses the soul and a touch puts it in jeopardy).
Basic patterns: Cultures (English , German, Scandinavian, Chinese, Japanese) with high emotional restraint concepts have little public touch; those which encourage emotion (Latino, Middle-East, Jewish) accept frequent touches.  
8. Smell
• USA — fear of offensive natural smells (billion dollar industry to mask objectionable odors with what is perceived to be pleasant ) — again connected with “attractiveness” concept.
• Many other cultures consider natural body odors as normal (Arabic).
• Asian cultures (Filipino, Malay, Indonesian, Thai, Indian) stress frequent bathing — and often criticize USA of not bathing often enough!
 
9. Paralanguage
   
   
• vocal characterizers (laugh, cry, yell, moan, whine, belch, yawn).  These send different messages in different cultures (Japan — giggling indicates embarrassment; India – belch indicates satisfaction)
• vocal qualifiers (volume, pitch, rhythm, tempo, and tone).  Loudness indicates strength in Arabic cultures and softness indicates weakness; indicates confidence and authority to the Germans,; indicates impoliteness to the Thais; indicates loss of control to the Japanese. (Generally, one learns not to “shout” in Asia for nearly any reason!).  Gender based as well: women tend to speak higher and more softly than men.
• vocal segregates (un-huh, shh, uh, ooh, mmmh, humm, eh, mah, lah).  Segregates indicate formality, acceptance, assent, uncertainty.
  
  
  
  References : http://www.andrews.edu/~tidwell/lead689/NonVerbal.html

What is communication ?

"Any act by which one person gives to or receives from another person information about that person's needs, desires, perceptions, knowledge, or affective states. Communication may be intentional or unintentional, may involve conventional or unconventional signals, may take linguistic or nonlinguistic forms, and may occur through spoken or other modes."
(National Joint Committee for the Communicative Needs of Persons with Severe Disabilities, 1992, p. 2)

References : http://www.unm.edu/~devalenz/handouts/defcomm.html

THE PROBLEM-SOLVING PROCESS

Step 1 - Problem Definition
Before you are ready to take any steps to solve the problem, you first have to be sure that you are clear about what the problem really is. It can be easy to get distracted by solving a different problem than what is actually causing distress if it is easier than dealing with the real problem. This step involves thinking about the following questions:

1. How is the current situation different from what I actually want it to be?
    
2. What do I actually want, or how do I actually want things to be?
    
3. What is preventing me from achieving my goals, or from things being the way I want them to be?

It can be very helpful to write down the answers to these questions so that you are forced to clarify that the problem you are defining is the actual one you want to solve. Just thinking about things in your head can cause confusion and end up distracting you from the actual problem at hand.
If you are dealing with more than one problem at a time, it may be helpful to prioritize them. That way you can focus on each one individually, and give them all the attention they require.
Step 2 – Problem Analysis
Once you have defined the problem, you need to think about it from different perspectives to insure that you understand all the dimensions of the problem.
The following questions can be useful to help you analyze the problem.

1. How is this problem affecting me?
    
2. How is this problem affecting other people?
    
3. Who else is experiencing this problem?
    
4. How do other people deal with this problem?

After you have completed this step, check to make sure that your definition of the problem still fits. It is not unusual at this point to find that the problem you really want to solve is different than the one you initially identified.

STEP 3 – ESTABLISH YOUR GOALS
Once you have looked at the problem from different perspectives, you can decide what you want to achieve and establish your goals. You need to answer the very specific question – “What is my immediate goal?”
Examples:

• Improve my time management skills
• Complete assignments on time
• Improve my grades

STEP 4 – GENERATE POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS
During this stage the goal is to generate as many possible solutions as you can. Do not worry about whether or not they are realistic, practical, or effective. Frequently a solution you might eliminate initially, with work can be developed into a very effective solution.
It can be very helpful to ask yourself what you have done in the past when faced with similar problems, and how other people you know have dealt with similar situations. In addition, you can also approach friends, family, a counselor, teachers, books, or the internet, etc. to obtain ideas for solutions. Be sure to write down all the possibilities you generate so that you can approach this task systematically.
STEP 5 – ANALYZE THE SOLUTION
During this stage, you will examine each alternative and write down both the advantages and disadvantages to each. Some considerations to keep in mind include:

• Is it relevant to my situation?
• Is it realistic?
• Is it manageable?
• What are the consequences – both good and bad?
• What is the likelihood that it is going to help me reach my goal?

STEP 6 - IMPLEMENTATION
The last step is to implement the solution you have chosen. This step involves identification of all the steps necessary to implement it, and also on-going monitoring of the effectiveness of the solution to make sure that it actually solved the problem. During this stage of the process, ask yourself the following questions:

1. How effective is the solution?
2. Did it achieve what I wanted?
3. What consequences (good and bad) did it have in my situation?

If the solution was successful in helping you solve your problem, then you can feel satisfied with your efforts and what you learned. If you feel dissatisfied in some way, you can either modify the solution to work better, or you can scrap it and turn to other alternative solutions, or begin the process again.
Remember that problem-solving is a cycle – it involves searching for a solution to a problem that will lead to various possible solutions which then need to be evaluated. If the problem is solved, then you have found an effective solution. If the problem has not been solved, then you start the process again.

References : http://www.lorainccc.edu/current+students/advising+and+counseling/counseling/problem+solving.htm

WHAT IS PROBLEM-SOLVING?

Problem-solving is a tool, a skill, and a process. As a tool is helps you solve a problem or achieve a goal. As a skill you can use it repeatedly throughout your life. And, as a process it involves a number of steps.
It is not unusual for problems to arise when you are working towards a goal and encounter obstacles along the way. Students usually have many and varied goals, both related to school and to other areas of their lives, and it is likely that you will encounter barriers to your success at times. As these barriers are encountered, problem-solving strategies can be utilized to help you overcome the obstacle and achieve your goal. With each use of problem-solving strategies, these skills become more refined and integrated so that eventually their use becomes second nature.


References : http://www.lorainccc.edu/current+students/advising+and+counseling/counseling/problem+solving.htm

Out of technology

Well, finally I have a blogg :) I'm saying "finally" cuz as u can see from the tittle, I'm out of technology. I know that for the time in which we live I could be very informed about technology and that is the reasson why I'll try to give my best for using blogg!